deep in the lush green rainforests...

of the Congo basin, the forest floor is littered with moist leaves, moss-covered trunks of fallen trees and massive roots of the still-living trees. here and there a few saplings poke their way through this layer of decaying vegetation. only a few stray shafts of light peek through the almost inpenetrable foliage of the forest canopy; it is dark, gloomy, hot and humid. the sluggish atmosphere is almost claustrophobic.

it is nearing noon, the hottest time of the day and the only signs of life are a few butterflies flitting about and a line of ants snaking up a tree. but the whole forest is teeming with life; the background sound of life is deafening- crickets chirping, wings fluttering, unseen frogs croaking, rustling of leaves, punctuated by shrill howling of some unknown tree-dwelling animal.

and then...a man(?) in purple tights walks out from behind the trees. he is wearing shining black leather jockeys over his figure-hugging tights. innerwear with built-in holsters (and guns) worn on the outside. his eyes are covered by a black mask that looks like a pair of bikinis with slits cut out.

he is the Phantom. he is known by many names including Kit Walker, but to the people of the forest he is the Ghost Who Walks.

i call him stark raving mad. anyone who walks around a hot and muggy rainforest in this kind of an outfit needs to talk to men in white lab coats. soon.

just a few hundred kilometres away...

there lives another man with an almost exactly opposite point of view when it comes to fahion. a white man, he is simplicity personified and wears next-to-nothing. except for a tiny loincloth made of leopard skin, that is.

just your typical dude raised by a family of gorillas, and oh yes, i almost forgot to mention, he is actually an englishman of noble birth. heir to a vast fortune in merrie ole england. owns a few castles and stuff. but the simple man that he is, he prefers to swing around trees in the steaming hot and stuffy rainforests in africa, uttering shrill howls and screams.

why do all these weirdos land up in africa?

they call him tarzan, lord of the apes. in england they know him as john clayton or lord greystoke. like phantom this guy requires urgent medical attention too.